It all started in high school.....

One beautifully day I realized that I am not as skinny as all the other girls. When everyone else was short and thin and little I found myself being tall and thick. Then the hysteriya started. With heavy Ukranian bones that I received from my lovely father it took me a countless amount of crazy diets and tears to realize that I am gong to have to either accept it or keep on hitting myself against the wall forever.

Luckily highs cool finished, and all the pictures from the graduation were deleted from my life. I had a big journey in front of me. At just 17 years old I moved to Sydney to study.

There came long three years of drinking and partying and not eating at all, science we'd rather spend our little cash on booze.

Then I got into a BIG relationship. I'm still in it. All the ghosts of past started to fade away and my lifestyle changed from one meal a day and running around non stop to three full meals and quiet relaxation. Naturally I started gaining. First it was only met as a good thing. " baby your bum looks so good " and so on.

Then a big half a year of stress. Big fight with a roommate, search for a new place to live, moving, fighting with ex roommate for money, finding out a huge problem with Australian visa, fighting in the court for my visa... All in just little six months. And unlike some people when I am under stress I eat. No. Stop. Everything. I can mix up rice with leftover strawberry jam, cover that all up with some OJ and add some cheese and chocolate. And if at the end of the day you d ask me what I ate, I would not be able to tell you - I wouldn't know.

So now here I am. With a boyfriend who loves me, but keeps on suggesting to go to the gym together, with my 21st in a month and body I'm scared to look at when naked.

The goal is to loose at least 7 kilos by 28th of February.

Lets begin....