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Crazy flippin' day in the office finishing 11 life insurance applications, 2 employees out, and two nearly-3-year-olds running around fighting about "Mine! No mine! No MINE!" Oy vey. But we're done. 2009 is finished. And I am so, so glad. It's not the time I am glad to see gone; it's the mistakes and difficulties. And, just like the scale, it's only a number - 2010 is a number not a representation of what will be. But there is the power of that kind of symbolism - of endings and beginnings. There is hope in a beginning. Endings are, well, the end of something.
The next time I walk into my office, it will be 2010, the beginning of a new calendar year, new goals, new achievements. In my business, the slate literally gets wiped clean. You start all over again. There is an optimism in that. Whether or not I make something of it is another thing entirely.
I am beat. Just tired tired tired. The yergh in my chest has loosened a bit and I didn't cough quite so much last night as I went to sleep. I was afraid it was going toward pneumonia, something I fear given my poor, scarred lungs' history. My lungs are the first part of my body to betray me when I've done too much, taken myself too far. And, consequently, the first thing to prevent me from a "proper" exercise regime. I get going, full bore, and then I get sick. The past 2 years has seen that happen more times than I can count on both hands. So I am necessarily having to learn a new definition around what "exercise" and "activity" mean. Retraining my gray matter and body to accept new definitions for long-term and hopefully permanent weight loss & health will require this sort of revision. Otherwise I will continue to be stuck in the same place.
Happy New Year, FatSecreters! And a bit of English 19th century poesy to greet 2010:
"And ye, who have met with Adversity's blast,
And been bow'd to the earth by its fury;
To whom the Twelve Months, that have recently pass'd
Were as harsh as a prejudiced jury -
Still, fill to the Future! and join in our chime,
The regrets of remembrance to cozen,
And having obtained a New Trial of Time,
Shout in hopes of a kindlier dozen."
~Thomas Hood
FOOD TIMING:
Bed time: 12:00
Wake time: 7:15
8:50 - 4:00 - green tea
10:30 - white mocha
11:00 - 4:00 - snacks (edamame & choc cookies)
4:45 - Dinner
6:00 - 9:30 - peppermint/green tea
9:30 - nuts
I brought fresh edamame with me to the office to make sure I had something to snack on throughout the day, but I expected to leave at 1:30, not 4:00, which put a HUGE wrench in my day because I was supposed to go to lunch with my friend Nic. As a result lunch got side-tracked completely until nearly 5:00. I was hungry at all after eating, but at 9:30 I began feeling a little nauseous so I ate some nuts. Bad day for eating, timing & liquids. I kind of expected it, but not to the degree that it happened. Glad I had the edamame with me. Need more fiber options. Looked up some foods on-line: artichokes and raspberries had shocking amounts of fiber, I had no idea.
View Diet Calendar, 31 December 2009:
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1406 kcal
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Fat: 67.88g | Prot: 53.59g | Carbs: 155.24g.
Breakfast: white mocha, green tea. Dinner: brown rice sushi, polenta, salmon, olive oil, braised brussel sprouts, baked chicken thigh, mrs. fields toffee cookie. Snacks/Other: walnut, brazil nut, pecan, almonds, peppermint/green tea, chocolate cookies, edamame. more...
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3480 kcal
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Exercise:
Walking (slow) - 3/kph - 40 minutes, Standing - 3 hours, Desk Work - 7 hours, Resting - 6 hours and 20 minutes, Sleeping - 7 hours. more...
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