Buttercup603's Journal, 22 Mar 16

He got offended because of a salad? Not worth seeing him again!!! Don't be pressured. You are responsible for you. You don't need people to tell you what to eat!!! 

well not offended exactly :l he just sort of was like "nobody bonds over salad" didnt want to make a first meeting even more awkward ..sigh thank you!  

Agreed! That's really controlling of him. You have the right to eat what is good for you and for your goals. Maybe goals are a good thing to bond over! 

Oh that's a shame. Wonder how he'd cope with someone with allergies, all I can usually eat out is a salad because I'm wheat and dairy intolerant. It shouldn't matter what you're eating, it should be you he's interested in! 

How did the actual date go? Did you guys hit it off? Will you be seeing him again? 

Lol @Mousy1109 ! The date was ok. Don't think it will work out though tbh he was a bit of a brat :D Barely worth the spaghetti :D Thanks everyone! Its just so awkward telling people i don't eat... have to field a million uncomfy questions! People actually ask "omg but why are u dieting?!" and i'm just like HELLO.... smh  

Doesn't sound like a keeper w that support! U could have ordered grilled chicken though instead of pasta though ;) my DH tries to get me to eat crap I just ignore him and he's finally getting it. But for a stranger to be offended of your food choice I'd have gotten up and walked away. Gotta do You first! 

Unless u don't eat meat! Forgot about that.  

I am curious as to why you let someone, a stranger, dictate what you eat? Who is in charge of your body? 

wow, i can't imagine a first date manipulating what you eat! this was just a salad, so yeah, not a big deal. if he does it now tho, what will it be like later? stay strong to what you know you want, don't let anyone else control you. 

eff him.. and ya know what sista.. you do you! Things will work out the way they should and you dont want to start something by having to adjust something positive in your life to something negative so someone else can feel better about themselves. You are amazing and you kepp doing the awesome job you are doing to better you! rant over lol! 

You could have opted for something besides spaghetti, not that you SHOULD have, wow, this dude sounds like a real jerk. BUT if I were on date (not happening, I'm married! :D), I would have ordered something spendy that was on my diet, like a rare porterhouse with mushrooms and greens or whatever was on the menu. I can't say I think you're going to be missing out if you don't have another date with this particular gentleman.  

Sometimes it can be socially easier to attribute something to someone else to avoid it being a point of contention. You could always chalk your order up to your nutritionist's/trainer's/doctor's instructions. Someone new doesn't have to know right away that you're your own nutritionist. Everyone's doctor has told her to eat well. An early date doesn't have to be a take a stand moment of taking ownership of your personal food choices, which you understandably didn't want it to be, which is why you changed your order. And then you say something like, "It turns out that eating this way makes me feel really good and happy, but I'd love a glass of wine with dinner!" And dazzle him with your smile. He just wanted to know you were into the date and him.  

No one has to justify why they are eating a salad or how they eat to a stranger or friend for that matter. I remember being out with a relative years ago. She was upset because I didn't order a full meal when we were out with her and her husband. She kept suggestion things off the menu I should try, in place of my half specialty salad and soup. When our food was served, she kept asking me to share her plate with her and I continued to turn her down. I had enough when she put a piece of fried chicken on my plate. I was really annoyed up to that point, then got angry with her by picking that wing up and placing it back on her plate and saying very stern "I told you I didn't want any, if I did, I would of ordered it!!" It was months before we spoke, but think I got my point across. My advice is to keep friends and family members that are supportive of your efforts and don't put up with those that don't.  

@ Philmck - Best answer ever! 

I was being sarcastic once and said, "I'm allergic to carbohydrates, they make me swell up like a balloon" Several people at work didn't "get' my sarcasm and instead became very supportive at helping me with my allergy. 

Wow! If he only knew you have so much support here...dissing him LOL 

I've recently started going on a bunch of dates, and while none have pressured me to eat something I didn't want to, I have been put in some socially awkward positions, so I can relate. When I do end up having a meal with someone new, I tell them what I'm having like "I'm just having a salad. I'm really proud of myself, I've dropped quite a bit of weight recently. My doctor is very happy." Good luck in the future, but I agree with everyone above. If he won't listen to you saying "no" about what you want in your mouth in public, what makes you think he'll listen to the word "no" in private? He's a jerk, and good riddance. 

Thank you so much for the support you guys! Yeah i wish i had ordered something healthier but it was an Italian restaurant so everything was pasta or pizza! But i ate only a little :) Lol @Seankelly ! I'm going to use the allergy excuse haha 

I hope you're not planning a second date with anyone who expects an explanation for what you eat. This must be why I'm not married!