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I just had a big aha. I couldn't figure out why I've been discombobulated and out of sorts. I am grieving. When I was in my 20's, my mom went into a coma unexpectantly, I was told she was going to die. She didn't die physically but she forgot who I was for years, could barely communicate, and her personality changed drastically. She was never as she was again. It was as if she died.
Fast forward to this past Monday when my son had a near miss with death when he hydroplaned, lost control of his car, and it was totaled. He is fine, but I took it hard because I'd had this earlier experience with my mom. On a subconscious level, I feared I would lose another beloved family member.
I bring this up because I can't use food to soothe myself and dull the uncomfortable feelings. Instead, I have to feel my feelings. I am thankful that they finally came to the surface because I was going a little crazy until I became conscious of what was going on underground. Maybe I am developing a new relationship with food.
What do you use instead of food to deal with emotional pain?
View Diet Calendar, 04 November 2015:
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1221 kcal
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Fat: 47.64g | Prot: 66.55g | Carbs: 136.38g.
Breakfast: Applegate Farms Organic Uncured Sunday Bacon, Trader Joe's Unsweetened Original Almond Beverage, Artisan Bistro country style potatoes & egg. Lunch: Evol Chicken Enchilada Bake. Dinner: Amy's Indian Palak Paneer. Snacks/Other: Garden Delites Garden delites roasted vegetable souffle, Celery. more...
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 Comments
Jill--Sorry to have not posted sooner -- had to limit my time on FS the past several days while occupied on a business trip, but did catch the earlier post a/b your son's accident and you both were in my thoughts and prayers. So glad to hear the damage was limited to the vehicle. Kudos to you for recognizing a potential emotional minefield and 'trigger' and searching for another salve beyond food . . . just the introspection and recognition alone is HUGE . . . I'm still trying to figure out an appropriate response to stressors -- since I tend to 'internalize' rather than share/unload on friends, I think simply talking them out with a family member of friend would be helpful to me.
04 Nov 15 by member: losinit1655
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I have found in the past three years that I have a wonderful support system of friends/buddies here on FatSecret to whom I can turn in a crisis. We are all here for you; vent as much as you need and we will pray for you and lift you as best we can. YOU ARE NOT ALONE in this. You are developing a new relationship with food and with yourself as well. It might help to channel your feelings into something positive for your life such as exercise or volunteering in some way locally to help others. You will get through this. You are more than you were in your 20's; you have maturity and lots of us in your corner. (((((hugs))))) and prayers. You are amazing! You inspire me!
04 Nov 15 by member: kclab
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First of all I am glad and relieved to hear that there was only damage to the car and that your son is ok. I can only talk for myself here as to how to deal with emotional pain without resorting to eating but I tend to write down what happened and how I felt about it or even draw cartoons and doodles. I know it sounds silly but this is what I tend to do these days to avoid comfort eating.
04 Nov 15 by member: zaza_gabor
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I go for a walk in the woods. I too am so grateful for all the members on this site to help me get through my tough time. Thanks everyone!!
04 Nov 15 by member: Sugar Waffle
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Sharing your feelings with loved ones, writing in a journal, using exercise to distract, etc. can help you avoid eating your emotions.
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I'm teaching myself to be completely in the moment, no distractions, just focus on the situation (positive or not.) However, stay away from food at that time.
05 Nov 15 by member: Scalewatcher3
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Thank!you for all of the thoughtful comments and suggestions. If not for your support and this site (which helps me to think twice before eating since I have to track everything), I am sure I would have used food to stuff down my feelings. I am much better now. Just the act of being aware of what was subconscious and knowing I'm not alone made all the difference.
05 Nov 15 by member: jillbronson
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