Transformation Butterfly's Journal, 11 Jul 20

Hello Fat Secret Family,

It's been a few weeks since my last journal. I bit the bullet and purchased a treadmill for my one bedroom apartment home. Reason for purchase to get walking in while at home nightly and on weekends as I am pretty much home bound if not at work (Not able to walk in parks and gyms are not in my sphere due to me being high risk.} The treadmill arrived on Wednesday and I picked it up from UPS on Thursday night as I didn't want anyone in my disinfected apartment. (Did I say I live in Florida) I was so excited and had a plan to get it set up on Saturday. I took Friday off work to restock my apartment with supplies (food, gloves, medication, etc., especially as I had not been shopping for at least two months as I had enough of the essential to make it for another two weeks.)

While driving home from work Thursday, after making last bank deposit of the day. I received a call from a co-worker on my mobile phone device telling me you know the issue with the office. I informed her that I had not received any emails or calls from anyone and it's almost 7pm. This person proceeded to tell me that someone in the office had tested positive with covid-19, after hanging out with friends over the July 4th. I told this person I knew something was wrong as a lot of closed door meeting taking place around 4 pm, but I was not told anything at all. I wear a mask all day everyday since March (Only person in the office doing so as I had ordered supplies back in January for my own safety. Company did not provide hand sanitizer or mask until May. I was also cleaning workspaces in my area with bleach and pine soil since March with out any issues. In June. I had a woman in my area complain to my boss about the cleaning and I was told to only clean my immediate area. I informed the other employees who use the shared space that they would be on there own as I was no longer cleaning. Ironically the person testing positive with covid was the same woman who complained about me cleaning and only came into the office twice a week since March for approximately 3 hours each time. This woman came to work on Tuesday coughing and sneezing on everything and even asked if I had any Lysol that she could spray her area. I informed her that we had not seen a bottle of Lysol since March.

I woke up early Friday and made the rounds picking up supplies from local stores, purchased a money order to mail weekly church tithes, and by 11 am I was back home doing laundry and disinfecting floors and counters. I received another call from co-worker telling me that a professional company would be in on Saturday to disinfect the entire office. (I have not seen my only son since December and have not been around any friends as we talk on the phone nightly.) I isolate every weekend and don't go anywhere until Monday morning and its work and home five days a week. Now I had to make an appointment to be tested for covid19. God was smiling on me after hanging up the phone I went online and got an appointment for MD Now for Saturday at 8:30 to be tested. (I did everything right and stayed home and away from people and now I may have covid19 because this woman had to hang out with her friends and party on the fourth of July. I watched fireworks sitting in a chair looking out of my bedroom window.)

It's Saturday at 3 am and I have not slept much at all as I am very nervous about testing. My son told me over the phone that he's sure that I am okay as I have not been showing symptoms and he does not want to talk about the virus. (My son is 21 years old, and normally attends FAMU University, my parents and grandparents are all dead, so I am the only one left on this side of the family.) I fell asleep sometime after 6:00 am and woke up at 7:30 rushing to get dressed for my appointment. (Luckly for me site is 6 minutes from my home). Arrived at site and cars sitting waiting for urgent clinic to open at 8:00 not one cancellation. Test took a total of 20 minutes including filling out paper work. It was uncomfortable having a swab shoved up my nose and it felt like it was hitting my tonsils. (Not physically possible but felt that way and burned a little. Tech told me that it might cause me to cry, but I am tough as my son said. Did I mention that I arrived wearing a mask and gloves and some people came without mask.) The receptionist was trying to hold it together as she told me and another lady that her father had died this morning but not from covid19. I received a call from a friend in Orlando around 2 pm telling me that he found out yesterday that he has prostate cancer stage 1.5 and will be going to surgery within a week his Name is Eddie Miller. I don't normally ask for prayers but I need my fat secret family to pray along with me for Eddie as he has two beautiful daughters age 9 and 10 and he is the only income earner for his family. He's like my brother from another mother if you can understand me. I told him he would be okay and he better do everything the doctors say or I will get in my car and drive up to Orlando during covid19 to kick his butt. I have 5 days to wait to see if I have covid19. Can I tell you sitting and looking at a treadmill in a box right now does not seem so very important. I will wake up on Sunday, morning (God willing) and strap on my sneakers, unpack that treadmill and get moving as this is the only thing I have some kind of control over right now.

The song , "I can only imagine" has come to me now while writing this journal and I getting a little emotional right now. I just want to say to all of you who have been responding to my post and are my friends on this site. THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!! To anyone who is reading this journal today, please think about someone else before you walk out of your house without a mask as you could be putting the next person you come into contact with on slow death sentence.

I will check in again tomorrow, as I have 5 days to contemplate my life.