Multiplicity1's Journal, 04 Jun 10

I am having a difficult night. I am feeling depressed and I am not sure why. I am overwhelmed by my list of tasks to do today. This is what I have decided to do. Several of you have said I am too hard on myself so I am going to take your word for that and I am going to try to work on building myself up. I will make a list of my good qualities to try and cheer myself up. I am intelligent. I am compassionate, I am a good buddy on this site (I realized today that I have 71 buddies and while I don't communicate with every one every day I probably stay in pretty close touch with at least half of them regularly - the others I send a note to once in a while). I am a good Mother. I am a good friend to my best friend Jean. I work hard at self-improvement. I have pretty good insight. I have done a great job staying on this food plan and keeping up my walking routine. I try to be honest (I am not 100% perfect at this but I work at it). I write well. I remember a lot from what I read and I read constantly. I'm feeling better after writing this list so I will go on to my gratitude list. I am grateful for this WOE and the fact that it has enabled me to get off insulin and my diabetic medications. I am grateful for my husband who is a very giving person. I am grateful for my two loving daughters especially I am grateful that my daughter who still lives with us enjoys spending time with me and my husband. I am grateful for our health and the fact that we have very good health insurance from my husband's retirement from the Navy. I am grateful that I don't have a lot of side effects from all the meds I need to take. I'm grateful for my husband's good job. I am grateful for all my friends in my 12 step program and for my 9 years of recovery. I am especially grateful for my buddies on this site. I am grateful I only gained 1.1 lbs. this week. I am grateful that my husband did not have prostate cancer and is recovering well from his surgery. I am grateful for my two grandsons. Now that I look at things I am a pretty lucky person with a lot of good in my life. I am feeling much better than I was when I started this journal note. Tomorrow I will get up start my activities and post to as many buddies journals as I can get to and then I will move forward with changing my life. Thanks to all of you for helping me to change. I definitely couldn't get through this process without all your help and support. Wishing all of you a healthy and prosperous evening and morning.

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1273 kcal

Fat: 88.90g | Prot: 75.49g | Carbs: 52.32g.   Breakfast: Splenda, Baking powder, Cinnamon, Egg, Butter, Flax seeds. Lunch: Green pepper, Tomato, Avocado, Lettuce. Dinner: Green beans, Ground beef. Snacks/Other: Smuckers Peanut butter, eas CHOCOLATE SHAKE. more...

2466 kcal

Exercise: Walking (slow) - 3/kph - 45 minutes, Resting - 13 hours and 15 minutes, Sleeping - 10 hours. more...