Good evening everyone!! I hope you are all doing well. I miss you all so much, I wish that I could get my computer to connect to my home wifi, then I could connect with you all when I get home from work.
Anyway, lots has gone on in my life. Some good, some not so good. I finally got a new car (new to me) and sold my old Tahoe. My boss gave a loan to get the new one and I was able to immediately pay it back with the sale of my car. The people who bought the Tahoe knew the numerous issues it had and still gave me enough to cover the loan and a little extra. It was a nice little surprise. The new car is a 2002 GMC Yukon. It has a lot of miles, but the engine was so clean and runs so quiet. The person that had it, really took care of it. There are a couple of cosmetic issues, but nothing too bad. It's a beautiful car. My boss told me that I didnt have to get such a big car anymore because I am so much smaller. It was a nice compliment. I drove my sister in laws truck the other day and I had to move the seat up because I couldnt reach the pedals! It was such a crazy moment.
As for my diet, I am doing alright. There are times I cheat. I need to be more strict, my birthday is coming next month and I want to have some cake and fried chicken so I need to lose more so I dont feel super guilty eating off plan!! Haha.
My husband said the sweetest thing to me the other day. I was showing him a collage I made, a pic from a year ago and then a pic from the wedding we went to the other night. I look so different, to me. I told him "I am finally becoming who I am supposed to be" and he said "this is who I have always seen you as, this picture isnt how I have ever seen you". It was silly, but I almost cried because I never thought that he saw me as beautiful even at my biggest.
I have had a lot of issues recently with my faith and my feelings towards God. I have been angry and confused. I have been ungrateful and hurt. I have prayed for a sign, prayed that God would show Himself to me in a real and obvious way. I've been struggling. My faith was rocked lately, with some really hard to handle news. I know that sounds stupid and like it's so easy to toss my faith aside. I am not denying God, I am just struggling with the idea that He really cares about me. I dont know if I am being clear, but I am just really confused right now, seeking guidance and answers. Please, if you are a pray for me. I dont know if I can do it for myself right now.
I am under 350lbs now!!! That was the most amazing thing to me. I was stuck in the 370s for a while!! I'm slowly getting there. I will conquer this mountain, I will come out the other side a victor!! Be good to each other. Be strong, be kind, be courageous.
Love you all!!
View Diet Calendar, 24 September 2018:
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1197 kcal
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Fat: 87.66g | Prot: 46.27g | Carbs: 61.08g.
Breakfast: Coffee (Brewed From Grounds), Great Value Heavy Whipping Cream Ultra Pasteurized, LouAna Pure Coconut Oil. Lunch: Moe's Southwest Grill Chicken, Moe's Southwest Grill Chips (Side), Moe's Southwest Grill Tomatillo Salsa, Moe's Southwest Grill Pico De Gallo (Side), Moe's Southwest Grill Queso (Side), Moe's Southwest Grill Cheese, Moe's Southwest Grill Pico De Gallo (Cup), Moe's Southwest Grill Grilled Onions, Moe's Southwest Grill Shredded Lettuce, Daisy Sour Cream. Dinner: Land O'Lakes Salted Butter, Cooked Spaghetti Squash, Pork Roast (Lean Only Eaten). more...
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