I can relate to this mess. And I feel that anything that you want to vent about st okay here or anywhere. Friends need support and I'm here to give it. My husband and I have both had some pathetic family members too and practice avoidance where they are concerned. Some people never grow up. No reason to put up with them. Hugs.
29 Jun 24 by member: -MorticiaAddams
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I have nothing to do with a brother and a sister due to their toxic nature. I reconciled once with my brother but it only lasted a couple years. Most of which has been over our moms passing back in 1997! Last year, I had enough from a sister over hoarding items. My hubby supports me too like you do your husband. We appreciate it even if we forget to tell you!
29 Jun 24 by member: Mello B
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Families always astound me. Ours was tiny and close. Just mom, dad and me. Didn't know that all families weren't that way until I experienced John's family. Tight with his kids, tight with his half brother. His sisters though and their kids...users, manipulators and liars. He had distanced himself from them and of course the blame fell on me. He did not want to talk to them about his diagnosis or treatment so they started hounding him (one called 30 times in a day) Cancerned maybe. Wanting to get the scuttlebutt more likely. No time for folk who are incapable of speaking and living in love. Blood ties don't mean connection. You have every right to vent YOH. Although this is a weight management forum, for most of us weight is so closely tied what is really going on in our lives and it helps to learn that people can stay mostly true to their personal goals and journey despite the chaos that surrounds us. You certainly are a model of that. Hang in there sister!
30 Jun 24 by member: Annisworkingonit
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My heart goes out to you and your hubs! Family relationships can be so tricky! It’s a hurtful situation for sure and it’s ok to vent! Sometimes we just need that support and maybe someone else has gone through something similar and can offer good advice. I wish I had the words to tell you what to do to make it better for your hubs but it sounds like you are doing the right things to support him and help him figure this out. That being said, it doesn’t make it easier. It’s very stressful and I totally understand. Take care my friend! Always here for support!💜
30 Jun 24 by member: Diana 1234
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I am so very sorry for what you are dealing with. Families can be such a challenge. You’re certainly allowed to vent . We are settling my father-in-law’s estate now and specific family members were excluded (by him) , so that has been difficult. Sending hugs and much support to you and your honey as you find peace at this difficult time.
30 Jun 24 by member: mimodw
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Family can wound or heal. It's sad they made the wrong choice 😔. We all have choices everyday and we can choose what to do with each decision. I I am sorry that they hurt his heart 💗 though.
30 Jun 24 by member: Leah_guffey
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Morticia thank you. It’s not even a matter of growing up its just a matter of cruelty for the sake of cruelty.
30 Jun 24 by member: Yearofhealth2023
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Mello b its a two way street. Hubs is very supportive of me as well. Best friend indeed.
30 Jun 24 by member: Yearofhealth2023
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Annisworkingoniti-it took me into my 50s to realize that toxic people are just that. Toxic. I of course have been blamed for hubs pulling away but the fact is i kept my opinions to myself for nearly 16 years till he finally had enough. The only reason i kept myself out of it for past six months is the death of MIL. But now that estate distribution is done and hubs duties as executor are over i will no longer keep quiet if forced to be around them. Civil yes. But they are such gross humans. The banker asked hubs when opening the estate account why he was chosen as he is the youngest and his reply was so true. He said because i am the most ethical. Made the banker blink. But it’s the truth. And yes, it has impacted my diet these going ons. My mom was the middle of 5 children and when my grandparents were both gone they all worked in unity. They all loved each other. My mom said she was glad she was the first to depart the earth as she didnt think she could bear the loss of even one of her siblings. They were her best friends. It’s sad and angering.
30 Jun 24 by member: Yearofhealth2023
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Diana thank you. I am quite sure there are loads of folks who have gone thru something similar or worse. Unfortunately. It does seem to help to vent tho 😀
30 Jun 24 by member: Yearofhealth2023
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Mimodw-im sorry you are going thru this too. Thank you so much for the support. I hope you are doing okay.
30 Jun 24 by member: Yearofhealth2023
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Leah_guffey-thank you sweet girl. Im sorry they hurt his heart too. So unnecessary.
30 Jun 24 by member: Yearofhealth2023
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Families are strange. When my mom passed, my brother's step children called the attorney so often wanting to know when they would get their money, he called and said they needed to step back. They went to the county to see how many acres the ranch encompassed. Their behavior made a stressful situation so much worse. I empathize with your husband. Thankfully he has your love and support.
01 Jul 24 by member: Tink1953
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Tink1953-yes it was like that. So many calls trying to change the executor and so forth. Or be able to change the decisions he made. Not new behavior tho, they have been grasping greedy hands out people for as long as i have known them.
01 Jul 24 by member: Yearofhealth2023
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Alot of us can relate to the issues you and your husband are going through, and we certainly have empathy. Hopefully, this will dissipate quickly, and life will go back to normal.
01 Jul 24 by member: Bionici
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Amen bionici. Sure hope so. Hoping there will leave him alone.
01 Jul 24 by member: Yearofhealth2023
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02 Jul 24 by member: Siegels
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YOH, i know it's sad, but blood doesn't mean you're family; it only makes you related. Every family has at least two or three who are without souls & selfish
i too suffer with family members whose venomous behavior makes even being in their presence for a few hours difficult
those types of people will always appear to some as good; but, it's only smoke and mirrors. Now, in the presence of someone like yourself and your husband because your heart is made different, the vipers will always show their fangs and their true colors.
i have learned to pray for them and that has helped me become better than bitter
(my late sister's son- who once was my nephew ❤️🩹along with his $ hungry wife)
02 Jul 24 by member: Alindsey83t
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Alindsey83t-i too pray for them. Not because i want to but because i dont want to give in to the intense disgust and dislike i feel for them. I have for years. Asked hubs recently if he met them in a social outing would he want to be friends with them. He said no. Kind of sums up everything. He has voiced that he wants to hurl back some of the mean things he could say..one of which is one of the sisters sued her parents after she (the sister) ran over her own child at her own house while MIL was getting the mail after babysitting this 3rd child for free as she had for the previous 2 kids for over 7 years. She sued them and won tho we cant figure out how. The child had a broken hand luckily (2 years old at the time). And then continued to ask their mom to babysit for another 13 years. Stuff like that. Gross. I told him to continue keeping his cool. Feels good in the moment to throw sharp words even if true but not so good when calm again. Higher road is not easier for a reason. Have had it in my own family and while staying calm doesnt always work it does help.
02 Jul 24 by member: Yearofhealth2023
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Thanks Siegels. Yep. New chapter indeed.
02 Jul 24 by member: Yearofhealth2023
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