I haven't even looked to see how long its been since I've written a journal, lol, but it's a pretty damn long time. To say I fell off the wagon would be an understatement! I've been so over 'dieting' and the like that I just stopped doing it altogether, so to come here and 'pretend' that I was dieting/exercising would've just been a lie, so sorry guys for being a bad buddy :(. I think my whole routine was out of whack after I completed Insanity, but I couldn't really get back into the swing of things wholeheartedly. I think my goal/priorities were skewed so it was hard to stay committed. I never completed P90X, but I made it through 6 weeks by December and I was/am very proud of that.
I also started working at the yoga store I had mentioned a few times before and that took up a lot of my time (another excuse I know, lol) but I learned a lot over the past few months and now I'm ready to get back on track.
What I've Learned:
1. I'm an emotional eater, I've known this for a while, but I think sometimes it's not so much of a problem and I need to learn to not associate food with comfort 2. I'm afraid to be thin! It's so weird and seems counterproductive, but the moment I get close to my goal I always go back in the opposite direction. As a fat/heavy person, it's so easy to blame things on your weight, that without that excuse you have to face your fears a bit 3. Sugar is like a drug to me, it's def my evil exbf to say the least, I'm so much better, physically/mentally without it, but all my comfort foods have it :( 4. I seem to be an all/nothing yo-yo dieter~when I'm "ON" I'm good, perfect, meticulous, driven,etc. When I'm "Off" I eat like I'm carb loading soda, cookies, fried rice, it's like I'm a pregnant woman lol 5. I need to enjoy my workouts or I won't do it. I think I conditioned myself to think of exercise as a chore/punishment so it made it a lot harder to do sometimes. Also, I get bored easily, so my follow through is pretty awful
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