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FRUSTRATION!!!!
I am so damn overwhelmed right now not to mention frustrated. No with my diet, if you even want to call it that. I don't. I am eating more now and healthier than ever before. I am a bit frustrated in how hard I am working and not seeing a huge change. But all in all still motivated.
I am frustrated at life today. I woke up did some light exercises after feeding my baby. Was feeling good, then my husband left for work and all hell broke loose. I was getting all the kids up, I have 4, and someone is knocking on my door. It was Fed ex with my 4yr olds kindergarden supplies(I homeschool).
I had someone call and it was important so I had to take it. Breakfast was sitting there getting cold, so I just threw it away. While on the phone, the kids and dog were getting into everything. Then I get off the phone and the dog is acting like she has to throw up. NOT IN MY HOUSE! So trying to make it in time I take her by the collar and put her outside. After she vomits, I call her in....well she had better ideas. She took off down the icy steps out of the driveway and over to my neighbors house and huge yard, all up hill. Calling her didn't work so I took off to get her, running, in my socks!!!
I finally get back shivering and shaking and freezing. Then I get her in here and she starts to dig at the carpet to say she has to go out so I get the leach grab my slippers and head out in a jacket, still coughing and wheezing from chasing her and still shaking. She takes her good ole time then we come in. At this point I can not stop coughing and feel like I myself may vomit.
Then I have to get on the phone and take care of insurance issues and I get 3 wrong numbers 4 voicemails and finally one live person. All the while my oldest is doing her school work nicely, thank you God, but the 4 yr old and 2 yr old are screaming and crying and fighting. Then my newborn wakes up and starts screaming. Mind you my kids(and the dog for that matter) are usually very very well behaved, except today.
I also tried some of the kindergarden program and could not get anything to work on the computer. UGH!!
All i wanted to do was eat, not over eat, just eat. I wanted to sit down and enjoy a meal. I got the kids all fed and the baby fed and calm and I sat down and ate, very fast, which I am trying to stop and until today have had success with. It was good but I wish I could have had more time to eat and enjoy it. I am hoping to get 3 kids to sleep and my oldest on schoolwork or reading a book and me, I want to go get on my treadmill.
I need to exercise today. I did a little this morning but couldn't do much. Actually I think that is my dog's problem today. She needs to go out for a run to burn some energy but I can't get out right now. So she is acting up.
I am also frustrated with lack of participation in a weight loss challenge within my friends group, same goes for my husband. He is not trying either although he said he would. Also friends saying oh I wish I could go exercise, well go do it. I homeschool 2 kids, breastfeed one child and have a toddler entering her terrible two's, and we have a dog. If I can find the time I think people without all of that can too.
I am not going to let any of this bring me down. I am losing weight, I deserve to lose weight and get healthy. I can only control myself, so I will.
Oh well writing this has helped. I do need to get one lil one down for a nap and try to get more schoolwork done. Hopefully my day just gets better and better from this point on. **Fingers Crossed**
View Diet Calendar, 08 January 2009:
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1355 kcal
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Fat: 53.26g | Prot: 80.40g | Carbs: 148.74g.
Breakfast: string cheese, nature's basket organic peanut butter, thomas english muffins. Lunch: mozzarella, italian dressing, grilled chicken strips, pilsbury pizza crust, Quaker rice cakes chocolate, string cheese. Dinner: bottled water, Stuffed Green Peppers. Snacks/Other: all l frozem lime bars, string cheese. more...
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2633 kcal
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Exercise:
Housework - 10 minutes, Calisthenics (light, e.g. home exercise) - 10 minutes, Exercise machine (moderate) - 10 minutes, Resting - 15 hours and 30 minutes, Sleeping - 8 hours. more...
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